Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Monday, May 30, 2011
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Saturday, May 28, 2011
You can teach a dog new tricks but that doesn’t mean that they can then just decide to go and lease an apartment
Friday, May 27, 2011
Scurvy Jane is a fan of free things. It doesn’t really natter what it is, if it’s free, she’ll take it and say thanks. Not too long ago, she faced a choice – borrow 300k from the bank to buy a new place to live or remain living in her own imagination which costs nothing. She chose the free option.
Recently she acquired a squirrel in a wheelchair. To make matters even better, she got a free bonus and that just made her as happy as a baby in a topless bar.
Staying on the animal theme, her next acquisition was of the canine variety. Again she was over the moon but there was something about this one that made me nervous. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it but I had a vague notion that dogs and cats are not too fond of each other. This coupled with the fact that she had just been given a free kitten sent alarm bells ringing in my head.
Because she got this stuff free, she didn’t mind spending $15,000 on a second hand product:
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Today a young lady stopped me and asked if I knew where “the car shop” was.
There’s a few things you should know about the collective at It’s good to mock. We crave situations which allow us to talk nonsense, we’re incapable of giving a straight answer to a question and we don’t know where “the car shop” is. I toyed with sending her on a wild goose chase but there were no wild geese in the vicinity so I decided to give her a break and told her I didn’t know where the shop was. I did however tell her that I knew how magnets work, how 3D glasses work and why we have earwax:
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
We rarely mind our own business at It's good to mock because minding your own business is boring. Armed with this philosophy, Jill Y and I have been carefully influencing Little Dill Y’s musical taste. It’s important to us that he makes up his own mind about things but we were bored so we thought we would try a little experiment. When he woke up this morning, I was wearing my ‘Bon Jovi are to music what Ryanair is to customer service’ t-shirt. The screensaver on his laptop exclaimed “I, Bon Jovi’s hair apologise for the irreparable damage I done to the ozone layer in the 80’s”. A mysterious new dartboard appeared with the faces of the members of Bon Jovi and the little guy had great fun throwing darts at the talentless faces. We then offered him the choice of listening to two pieces of music. One was Bon Jovi and one was not. He chose the correct piece of music though I told Jill Y that his choice may well lead to some underlining issues that need to be addressed:
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
As long as Little Dill Y expresses himself in a creative way, his mother and I will continue be happy. He’s 5 now and the other day he came and told us he wanted a Mac. He gave us many of the reasons why a Mac is better than a PC. When those 6 hours were up, we applauded him for making such a compelling case and we both agreed that Apple make far superior computers than Microsoft or any other company. We also told him that Apple products are more expensive and that we’re as broke as the country that borders Bulgaria, Albania and Turkey. Next of all we hear “but Uncle Thirsty Dave uses an Apple and Aunt Scurvy Jane uses an Apple and I’ll never figure out how magnets work on my PC”. We told him that that was nonsense and he could continue his studying of magnets on his PC. He sulked for ages and then, all of a sudden his expression changed. He went to the kitchen, returned a few moments later and told us in no uncertain terms, that he wanted a Mac. Because he expressed himself so well, we decided we would get him a MacBook for his next birthday:
Monday, May 23, 2011
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Friday, May 20, 2011
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Monday, May 16, 2011
Sunday, May 15, 2011
You’re task today is to figure out how magnets work?
I was tired and mistakenly used ‘you’re’ rather than ‘your’. The clever little brat wasn’t long in letting me know of my mistake but I suppose he was creative about it so I shouldn’t really complain:
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Friday, May 13, 2011
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
To be cont.…