Focus on Fotography

I’m thinking of turning my hand to photography and becoming brilliant at it. I was given a book and I reckon it shouldn’t take too long to learn the tricks of the trade. I think I already understand the dramatic difference of a photo taken with and without flash:

 

Just when you thought it was safe to go back on the internet

The universe if full of unexplained incidents. One of the most bizarre is Rick Astley. In the 1980’s this man had the face of a small boy but the singing voice of a grown up. During the 1980’s he had a smash hit No. 1 single ‘Never Gonna Give You Up’. Nobody knows quite how it came to pass but two decades later, that very same song would become a huge hit again (although some people blame the internets). Even now, when the song is played, the very same promised words can be heard:

There is however, another school of thought that believes Rick Astley has been around for a lot longer than the 1980’s. These people believe that he first began performing the song, back in the days of olde:

Nobody knows what the future holds for Rick Astley. Some say he turns metal into gold, in the blink of an eyelid. Others believe he is a Double Agent, a ‘Rick Bond’ if you will:

Way to go - but which way?

Decisions -  it’s all about making decisions. Do I have brown bread or white bread for my sandwich? Do I save that miniscule amount of money or spend it? Do I hate Thierry Henry more than Bon Jovi? It’s the decisions we take now which make us the person we become later on. We need to know that decisions have consequences and consequences can have positive or negative outcomes. Sometimes it’s hard to know which way to turn in life, as can be seen in the below picture:

Nothing beats a nice cup of tea

There seems to be a tea for everything these days so I thought I would jump on board the tea train and see where it brought me.

I wasn’t in the mood for work at all so I took some ‘Neutralise Work Tea’ and all of a sudden the pain disappeared and I wasn’t bothered about it at all.

When I arrived at the office, I realised I had no cash with me and couldn’t buy a coffee. This presented a serious problem. The thought of having no coffee in the morning, produced a feeling which I would imagine is akin to what a dog feels before he throws up because of the fear of having no dog coffee or whatever the equivalent to dog coffee is. Throughout the ordeal, I had forgot to remember that I had brought some ‘Coffee Detox Tea’ with me and a quick cup postponed the panic.

I went to a meeting and as usual, most of what was said went over my head. It was like they were speaking a different language. If I hadn’t of brought a cup of  ‘Understanding Nonsense Meetings Tea’, it might of turned into one tough meeting.

You may not of heard of these three teas as they’re fairly new to the market. Check out Stanley’s tea discovery below:

Take a look at the kids of today who will grow into the grown ups of tomorrow

I sometimes wonder about the future. When this happens, I look at the kids of today who will grow into the grown ups of tomorrow. Today’s kids seem to have a lot more attitude and aggression compared to when I was little and I wonder if this is a good thing. This is what I’m talking about:

This little dude doesn’t like sandcastles at all and has no problem telling us about it.

This little girl doesn’t believe what she’s been told.

Even babies are letting us know what they like.

Down with this sort of thing, the youth of today...

I was thinking about reinventing myself as a grumpy old mocker. It shouldn’t be too hard to sort out. I’ve done a bit of research and I think I need something to give out about. It can’t be the weather, the economy or the lying, cheating, dog Thierry Henry because it would be too easy to pick on the massively obvious. I need something that the majority of the public don’t know about, something that people will be outraged with and I think I found exactly the thing. I’m all for giving kids as much choice as possible at an early age but this is just wrong:
 

I dreamed a dream

This was going to be a secret but I’ve decided to share. I’ve been having some strange dreams lately and when I say they’re strange, I mean weird. I dreamt I was a mouse who was visited by two other mice. What happened next is a bit hazy but they wanted to speak to me about cheese or maybe it was religion? As I say, that part is a bit  of a blur. It went something like this:

The ‘Esc’ Key

People are very much creatures of habit. We’re also very lazy. If there’s a way we can make tasks easier, we’ll jump on it faster than Madonna in a Malawian orphanage. We take certain things for granted and depend on them to do what they’re supposed to do. The It’s good to mock alarm clock goes off each morning and ensures I get to work on time but what happens when the alarm clock doesn’t go off? The milk is delivered in the morning which means I can drink coffee which is needed more than oxygen itself but what happens when the cows decide they don’t want to produce milk? When I make a mistake on a computer, I use the ‘Esc’ key and it’s all good but what happens when the ‘Esc’ key decides its had enough? This is what happens: